Defying Gravity

Sarah, 18, singapore

I made all of them:) apple crumble was for my mom, the potatoes for jac, the milo muffins for Chaisy’s birthday celebration. I had to put a note over the milo muffins after i baked them just in case my brother came along and decided to feast on them.

I really really enjoyed myself yesterday at the Botanics, meeting up with my ac classmates and friends. I never thought i’d say this but i miss seeing them everyday. My theory with jac about the whole superior/inferior/self confidence thing holds. Quite a busy weekend, although i don’t know why i was so tired. No more stamina from the A level days i’m getting old. I went to watch Avengers(finally) with my mom on saturday to celebrate the start of her school hols. Parents can be so SUAKU in the cinema hahah it was quite funny. Walked around orchard with her for a bit then came back. Made my own lunch, crashed, made muffins and then had cg all the way. Sunday was church, lunch, then Chaisy’s birthday then dinner with my mom. It was SAO HOT at the botanics, which was where the celebration was held. I felt so dehydrated after that, but sunkissed in a good way hahah. I”m too pale, just that i have weird tan lines now, like a shoe tan line. Had work today, did some admin that involved me lifting a lot of heavy files to cross check and verify some paper work and documents. Spent some time gossiping with my colleague, fun stuff:) Just cut my hair too! A lot of people noticed (mostly girls) and said it looked good:) Rui wen said it made my face look slimmer so yay!! I’ve been trying to eat healthy and lose the weight i somehow gained from somewhere. Hoping to lose it before i go to uk for kor’s graduation and that’s in three weeks! But its a tough battle i don’t know why i always feel like eating things, snacks mainly, ESPECIALLY when i’m going healthy. I want to lose weight the healthy way ie the right diet and exercise. I’ve been trying to pacify the hunger pangs with fruit and going for regular runs (not doing my back too good though, i’ve been told to cut down on those alr) Hopefully my current diet works. If not i’ll have to resort to this three day diet thing my mom’s friend gave us. It involved eating BEETROOT ahmygosh i hope i don’t have to.

Had quite a busy day yesterday! Things were quite okay in the morning, i got to wake up late(yay) cause i had to go for driving in the late morning so i was going into work late. Hahah perks of being the boss’s daughter=flexible working hours. Trying to get my license before i got overseas! Well, this was my first driving lesson in FOREVER since my instructor got hospitalized, my guess is that he probably smoked too much. Ohwell, he said i wasn’t bad for someone who hadn’t had lessons for a month:) anyway so after that i was planning to go into office. But Jiam msged me last minute and said she could have lunch! And she’s been so busy and stressed with work i thought i’d better seize the opportunity. Wanted to drop my bag in office first before i met her but i was already running late:/ Jiam works like two buildings down from me. she treated me to claypot rice! it’s funny cause the other day i was telling my brother that i’ve never had a pot of claypot rice to myself, guess i can take that back now. After that i finally went into office and did some stuff, like updating myself on which cargos are coming in, etc. Then i left to go home to cook something for Jac since i was going to drop by her dorm at sutd in the evening. So i was at work for a grand total of 2.5 hours heheh. Had to rush a bit to get the stuff for jac, but it was worth it. She’s not doing so well poor babe:( and she really wanted those cream potatoes last time, so i thought it would cheer her up, and it did! well, slightly, she managed to eat at least three quaters of it. Not because it wasn’t good( cause it was!!) but because she hasn’t been having much of an apetite. Sutd is actually quite a nice campus, and i live really near it. I forsee myself going there more often now. Well, after that it was quite late so my parents came to fetch me and i went home to chill before i went to bed, and with that it concluded my day.

I’m on this new diet. I don’t eat anything and when I feel like I’m about to faint I eat a cube of cheese. I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.

(Source: eblunts, via bergdorfprincess)

Things have been a little worse for wear. I guess i’m just really confused as how to approach it, i don’t know how to act, i don’t know what to do. I try to be really understanding and nice, and give in a lot to you, esp when i see that you’re really moody and sad, etc, i mean, i still care for you. But i don’t know what you feel on your side. And it can feel like you’re just doing this for old times’ sake, that you don’t really want to have anything to do with me. I don’t know which is better actually. I need you to do your part. Show me you care. And i don’t just mean little attempts that you can just get by with, with no real feeling or emotion. I want to know you care enough to reach out to me.